Blonde Hair May Be Hazardous To Your Health

This woman does NOT represent the average blonde female intelligence level.  F Y I. 
She does, however, make it difficult for some of us, doesn't she?

Blonde jokes.  I don't hate them necessarily.. but they do get old.  Especially after hearing them for many, many, many years.  Occasionally they can be humorous, but usually they are just silly - predictable and worthy of only a slight eye-roll.  People sometimes throw them at me and expect some type of reaction.. and I really can barely bring myself to even fake-chuckle these days.  It's not that I'm feeling ridiculed and hurt (which yes, I know is the intent on certain occasions!).. it is because I appreciate fine humor, and this just isn't it.
That being said..  I think that I have become the embodiment of a very bad blonde joke this week. Maybe not an actual joke per-se.. but even I will admit that I have had a couple of 'blonde moments' this week.

{Setting:  Living room.  It is early on Saturday morning and I have a killer headache.  Flashback to the evening prior when I was selecting the bottle of wine at PF Chang's and said 'I think maybe that wine gives me headaches.  No, I don't think that is the one.'  It WAS the one.}
I am laying on the couch with a cold compress on my head (thank god - that was a moment of brilliance on my part b/c it actually helped more than the ibuprofen).  Devi brings me a toy 'fireman hose' that Maya rec'd for Xmas.  It holds 3 small blue balls.  After loading the balls, you pull back on a lever and they fly out - I guess they are supposed to look like water.  Not really sure where the toy manufacturer was going with that.
Anyhow, not surprisingly - the kids have lost all but one ball.  Devi does not understand why it will not work with only one ball (we have tried many times and it will not work - the ball or 2 balls will simply slide out of the hose and fall, anticlimactically onto the floor) and is beginning to throw an extremely loud 2-yr-old tantrum.
I take the gun.. oh I mean the 'fire hose' (psh) from her and look into the shooting end (that's the technical term.. ha).  I see that she has loaded the one lonely blue ball into the hose.  It seems to be stuck.
While eyeing the ball, trying to figure out what is holding it in place (it usually just falls out).. I pull back a bit on the lever.
Needless to say, the dam ball comes flying out of that gun at an ungodly speed and hits me directly in the right eye.

Fast-forward 2 days.  I'm in my office, prepping for an upcoming photo shoot.  I pull out my portable black backgrounds.  I haven't used them in awhile, and I need to fold them up from their 5'x7' size into their collapsed ~2' circular size.  I grab one, maneuver it a bit.. and it suddenly pops back into its full size, smacking me directly in the face at the same time.
If you are not a photographer or someone who has seen or used one of these stupid things.. you probably cannot fully appreciate that moment.  The only thing that would have made it better is if I was in front of a client at the time that happened.  {eye roll}
Here's a video of some other poor fools trying to fold a reflector (and bear in mind that my expandable background is heavier.. but same concept) so you can get the idea:

Maybe I should get some low-lights. 

No comments:

Post a Comment